SURFIN’ SAFARI SUMMER THREE - DAY TEN - July 18, 2021

 

Surfing and Health.

Safe Mary (Maria Segura) the caregiver showed for a second consecutive week on Saturday. She is worth more than gold. Up to now, I have always thought Anna could not have a better situation than to be cared for by the one who loves her etc., but Safe Mary is so much more skilled and Anna so much more comfortable with her.

Anyway, it was a chance to launch the tenth Safari of the summer out to Marina del Rey. Summer three was envisioned as a chance to explore and write about surf locations not yet shared, but ‘twas not to be.

These Safaris appear to have two protagonists - Stephen and Anna - but the big player is really Alzheimer’s disease. The mapping of our travels has become more circumscribed by the disease itself. As Alzheimer's advances, our area of travel shrinks.

Looking at posts from two summers ago, it is unnerving to see how much of Anna was still present and what we could do together as a couple. We went to taco stands and travelled far south as Swami’s in north county San Diego and as northward as Surfer’s Point in Ventura County. She could talk, express preferences, patiently sit at the blanket, and comment on my surfing.

Not any more.

Last year, we went a few places and she eventually dropped out. The truth is you can manage the crazy behavior until it gets too crazy, which is where we are now.

There are five hours to play with when Safe Mary, or whomever, shows. I could hit Topanga or Sunset or venture even farther up into Malibu, but I have been to the Marina ten times thus far for a very specific reason…

....Mine own health.

The proximity and familiarity reduces time and stress driving. I know where to park and it is always right on the sand. That is big. The beach itself is empty and Venice Pier juts into the water a mile away, affording the opportunity to surf-run-surf or run-surf-run crosstrain. Once I’m done, I get an $8 Mexican fruit salad with tahine and lime (for $10, because I like "El Frutero"), so it is all sunshine, fresh air and clean livin'.

Five years after the diagnosis I am weary of caregiving, of following my wife around the house with her shoes on the wrong feet or the breast cups on her top protruding from her back. It is soul-crushing stuff that never stops, rather increases in frequency. Diapers are on the horizon.

I have been to the hospital three times in two months and delivered CPR to my wife until she vomited. I have seen her sit, naked and lacerated, in a pile of her own feces while doctors and nurses chatted calmly about their daily doings.

Throughout it all I could feel my constitution creaking and my psyche straining and THERE IS NO WAY IN THE WORLD 100 surfing outings over the past three years haven’t played a role in keeping me whole.

So now, the surfing is less a travelogue, or a device for stimulating what was once a mildly affected patient, and more about staying sane and out of the hospital myself. Alzheimer’s has taken my wife and damaged my son so...

...I am surfing for health.

It was a feast of waves for the second time in three days. The fruit salad had extra chunks of mango, and I returned to find Anna in good shape, and prepared to present myself as someone fitter still.

I am surfing to survive.

 


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